The Scottsdale Property Shop
Humor & Fiction Archives
All work and no play makes Paul a dull boy ...
Willy Was a Liar
Willy was a liar. Not a teller of tall tales, not a stretcher of the truth, but a pathological liar. Whether swearing that his Uncle Doug played cowbell on Blue Oyster Cult's 'Don't Fear the Reaper,' or assuring an unsuspecting child that one plus one equals purple,...
Real Estate Investor Attempts Tax-Deferred Exchange; Gets ‘Occupied’
Scottsdale, AZ - A Valley man attempting a tax deferred housing exchange has met with unlikely opposition: the self-described 'ninety nine percent'. Retired postal worker Bryce S. Rhite is currently in the middle of selling the South Scottsdale investment property he...
Local Real Estate Brokerage Cancels Popular Charity Event, Cites Lack of Leads
Paradise Valley, AZ - Citing a lack of viable leads, local Real Estate giant, Kraken Realty has announced the cancellation of its annual 'Strike Out Gout!' charity event. A Valley institution since 1992, the popular fundraiser has been a bright spot in the fight...
Local Real Estate Agent Admits Home Not Really ‘A Steal’
In a stunning declaration, local Scottsdale Real Estate agent Barry Sniggles admitted today that his listing at 1007 N Firewater Blvd is not really a steal. While it is unclear exactly what prompted the confession, Sniggles has been besieged with demands from...
The House on Foreclosure Hill
The wind whipped up and down Oak Street, depositing stray leaves at the feet of the group loitering in front of the last house at the top of the hill. The late October chill worked its way inside loose seams and under plastic masks as the motley assemblage of...
Online Home Evaluation
“Friedster, what the hell are you doing with that chicken?” Startled, Ned Friedgen looked up to find his moon-faced boss hovering in the doorway. “Oh. Hi, sir,” the design engineer acknowledged. “Just fiddling with the ‘Nequity’ algorithm again.” Squawk! “What’s with...
Three Agents Walk Into a Bar
Three Real Estate agents sat shoulder to shoulder at the bar of a local watering hole, sipping happy hour cocktails like they did every Friday. One made his bones in the current market as a bank owned property (REO) specialist. Another had carved out a niche in the...
Realtors To Stop Photographing Themselves in Bathroom Mirrors
Scottsdale, AZ - According to a hastily released statement from the National Association of Realtors this morning, the 1.2 million active members of the nation's largest trade organization will hereby stop including themselves in property listing photos. Effective...
The Tenant and the Cabana Boy
Joyce DeMannon traced a white glove-encased fingertip over a lamp shade and inspected it for residue. Satisfied, she gave a curt, reluctant nod to the head of the maid staff. “Turndown service every morning, of course,” the chambermaid informed her dour guest....
Americans Divided on Real Estate Recovery
(Scottsdale, AZ) - Coke versus Pepsi. Republicans versus Democrats. Ginger versus Mary Ann. You can throw the Real Estate recovery onto the list of great American debates. According to recent polling* of consumer confidence by the Fallacy-Inclined Bureau of Statistics...