What’s Mean and Grey and Stupid All Over?
There are dragons lurking in the dark recesses of your property listing. Mean dragons. Scaly, grey, mean dragons that might rise up out of their lairs and go all Godzilla on your potential showings if left unchecked.
And what, pray tell, is the name of these marauding reptiles?
“REALTOR Remarks”
Ah yes, that hobgoblin of good intentions in the multiple listing service that provides for private communication amongst local Realtors. It gives me a good shudder just to type the name of the foul beast. Suburban legend has it that if you say it three times in front of the bathroom mirror with the lights off, you will doom yourself to a lonely stint on the market. Why? Because the private portion of the Arizona Regional Multiple Listing Service which is intended to impart “eyes only” information to the Real Estate sales force is home to some of the most spectacular lapses in judgment this side of New Coke.
“Do not approach cage, monkey will bite!”
“Disregard water damage in hall bathroom shower.”
“Bring me an offer, seller needs to sell NOW!!!”
From the laughable (“House is better than pictures make it look”) to the horrific breaching of client confidentiality (“Divorce situation: husband not cooperative”), one little notation in the private remarks of the listing can torpedo the price you command for your home, if not endanger the sale altogether. Alarm codes, additional showing instructions, agent to agent disclosures – all are intended fodder for the REALTOR Remarks section. The mistake that is often made, however, is that anything goes so long as it remains hidden from the prying eyes of the public.
The moral of the story? Read the full property listing before your agent inputs it into the MLS. While you will most likely view a copy of the completed listing once it hits the system, you will not be able to see what is privately disclosed to other agents. You will want to see a copy of the FULL listing to ensure that your best interests have not been compromised by a few careless words.
You priced the home well, staged it to look its best, had it professionally photographed, toured and dispersed to the far reaches of the Internet. Don’t blow it now, kid.
Of course, if you want me to avoid your home like the plague, make sure your agent denotes that it “smells kind of funky, but no known presence of mold.”
In the mood to receive offers that are 50% below your list price? Instruct your agent to notify fellow Realtors to “Bring me any offer and I’ll get it accepted!”
Unless the Stargate in the study presents a clear and present danger to those who would tour your home, best not to mention the possible credit for intergalactic species remediation.
