Man was not meant to live on plants alone. It’s true. For the fruit and nuts enthusiasts in our midst, I point to the presence of your canines as proof that you are doing it wrong. While your squeamish frontal lobe may prevent you from supping on our furry friends, your crocodilian brain never stops sizing up the risk/reward of skewering the neighbor’s yipping mini-pin.
Rather than shy away from that which places us atop the food chain, we here at the Scottsdale Property Shop embrace our inner predator. As a matter of fact, you need to sharpen those base instincts before entering the Real Estate market in pursuit of housing prey. Let’s augment that testosterone deficiency and get you ready for the negotiation dining table.
List your home with the Slaybaughs prior to August 1st, 2010 and you’ll receive one complimentary membership to the Endangered Species of the Month Culinary Club! That’s right, enjoy the legally frowned upon Spotted Owl Stir Fry or the Komodo Alamodo from the privacy of your own barricaded domicile! Got a hankering for a Hairy-Nosed Wombat? A craving for a California Condor? We’ve got you covered … but only until August 1st!
*Promotion limited to one membership per depraved household. Antivenom and clandestine courier fees not included. This offer is patently absurd and excluded in all 50 states, US territories and pretty much everywhere else outside of Kuala Lumpur. Winning entrants will be placed on several watch lists and subject to possible excommunication from humanity.*